Third time's the Charm!!

Whew!! Life's really managed to get away with me again, and I've been a bit slow in posting the most recent ultrasound photos. Baby finally cooperated!! I was SO thrilled to SEE his adorable little face finally, without his hands blocking the view!! He's definitely going to look a lot like Daddy, but we noticed a few of my features as well. I can't WAIT to compare these photos to his 'actual' face!

I can't believe how much I can *love* this little guy who I've never met...

365/150

I made it! One year, one hundred fifty posts.

...and what have I got for you on this fine day? Oh, you know, proof that our baby is going to be just as hard-headed as his mommy. Thanks for makin' mama proud, booger!!



P.S., do-over number two is scheduled for a week from tomorrow.

Cute baby alert!!

Ok, I know it's not the clearest photo in the world... but it's a start! Baby sure wasn't interested in having his picture taken tonight, so he spent a lot of time hiding behind his hands and rolling away from us. Because we just couldn't get much in the way of a great photo, the u/s lady invited us to come back for a do-over next Saturday... she was SO nice, and I'm so excited to go back!!

Hello? Can you hear me now??

Wow... guess it's been a while since my last update, hmm?

I've really got nothing. I've been so bogged down with the garpartment renovations and efforts, packing and... well, life! I'm alive, though, and thought everyone deserved some semblance of an update. So here, I give you a partially finished kitchen...



Enjoy!


P.S., 3D ultrasound next Friday... baby's first photo shoot!!Waa-hooo!!

It's a...

I'm sure surprised... I just *knew* I was going to be correct in my guess, and I was sooo wrong! What a shocker! lol!

It's a BOY!

Tomorrow, tomorrow!!

We're SO close to tomorrow... and my ultrasound!! I'll post the results as soon as I'm able, but consider yourselves warned, I'll be gone a good part of the day... might be an evening post!!

Happy Fourth of July!

Yep, you know the drill... wishing everyone a Happy Fourth, though it is almost over.

Only THREE days to go before the big ultrasound if you don't count tonight! I'm soooo antsy!! Suddenly though, I've begun to worry--what if baby doesn't WANT us to know what he/she is?? Let's hope Baby W isn't shy!!!

Participation Request!

Mornin'!

Since it's early, the cat woke me up, and I've currently got nothing better to do... I thought you'd all have a little fun guessing what kind of munchkin I've got baking in my belly. The poll closes on July 7th at 9:00 PM, and my ultrasound is scheduled for July 8th. Look for the results sometime on the eighth. If you've got any "questions" that might help you make your decision, leave them as a comment and I'll get back to you.

Give me a guess and satisfy the crazy preggo :o)

Yaa-heeeee!!

I'm home, I'm home! Sorry to have taken so long for an update...

Everything looked great. Baby was a squirmy-wormy, so we got to watch the little booger on the screen for nearly an hour while they tried to get the measurements they needed. Neither of the techs were willing to venture a guess as to the gender of our little bean, but that's ok... I can make it another, what, six weeks? My anatomy scan is scheduled for July 7th.

The results of the NT Scan measurement were well within the "normal range," which is another plus. We'll have more information a few weeks from now, following my second blood draw around sixteen weeks.

So, thank you for all of your well-wishes and for checking in on me... all is well tonight in the Weedon Household!!

Big day tomorrow...

It's a big day tomorrow!! I have to be in Seattle at 12:45 for an ultrasound at the University of Washington Medical Center. The ultrasound is scheduled to last an hour, and then we're signed up for a second hour with a Genetic Counselor.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't at least minimally nervous. I have a multitude of reasons for my feelings... but let me just give you the highlights.

TWELVE WEEKS. On Tuesday, I'll hit twelve weeks for this pregnancy... I know, I know... wahoo!!! Second trimester! But it's not that simple. When I was pregnant with Brody, I went to my twelve-week appointment on Halloween. We listed to the heartbeat on the doppler in the doctor's office, and all was well. I was so thrilled to be leaving the first trimester... only to discover, weeks later, that Brody didn't make it past fourteen weeks. This will be a trying time for me, at least until we make it past the point where we lost Brody.

WHAT WILL THEY FIND? This is another sticky spot for me... I'm nervous, just like anyone else would be, to hear the results of the ultrasound. For those who aren't familiar, at about twelve weeks there is an elective test that can be done where measurements are taken of the back of baby's neck. Those measurements can help diagnose the potential for Down's Syndrome.

You might be thinking... why have the test done? Well, if you haven't ever met Ryan's family, you probably don't know about Kenny. You can read about him HERE. Because of our family history, the procedure was recommended to us... and we opted to have it done, although the results wouldn't ever change our feelings about this pregnancy.

Anyway... probably the majority of that was a lot of useless banter... the important part? We get to see our little booger baby on the big screen tomorrow! Yaheee!!

I feel like Fluffy...

This is Fluffy, Ryan's Grandma's Cat. Today, I feel like Fluffy. For those of you who know Fluffy, no further description is necessary. For those of you who have not yet had the pleasure of meeting Fluffy, the only necessary explanation is that Fluffy is a bitch. A crazy, hissing, dramatic bitch.

Post-Christmas Let Down... It happens to everyone, maybe just not in the same way, wouldn’t you agree?
I’m disappointed, but I’m also relieved, because the Holiday Season was just more than I could handle this year. I don’t feel very eloquent this evening, so let me make a list:

Why I’m Disappointed:
• January is generally a terribly depressing month because it’s so… boring.
• The Christmas decorations and goodies have to be packed away for another year.
• I no longer have an excuse for indulging in so many Christmas goodies.Time to become best friends with Mr. South Beach once again!
• The presents have all been unwrapped, and now my house is filled with trash… wrapping, boxes, Styrofoam, just… trash.

Why I’m Relieved:
• It was hard to see family… there was more than one “awkward silence” as people searched for something to say, and it was even more awkward when they chose to just pretend this whole mess had never happened.
• Perhaps now our bank account will recover.
• People will come back to their senses now and suddenly remember that, yes, they DO know how to drive through a parking lot! People will also be somewhat more “normal” in the stores.

Other Things that a Wrong:
• Today I would have gone to the doctor for an ultrasound, and would have been told if I were having a boy or a girl
• We missed the garbage man on Monday. This means we will have double the normal trash, plus Christmas trash… and on top of that, it was recycling week, and my big recycling can is FULL! What to do with all of these boxes and water bottles??
• It has been 29 days. I have cramps but nothing else. How are these related? If you’re a female… do the math. You’ll understand. No, I’m not pregnant, just all screwed up from everything that has happened, I suppose.

Things that are Good… just for Balance:
• Chrismukkah is almost here! It’ll be nice to see everyone… and I’m very excited for Matzo Ball Soup!
• Ryan was very excited/surprised about his Wii.
• I got all kinds of fun stuff for Christmas… including a Coach wallet (contents of the mysterious brown box have been confirmed!), Ugg boots, a paper shredder (hey! I think it’s exciting!), kitchen stuff, a digital picture frame… so many neat things.

Ok, there, that feels better. Lists work for me… they make me feel more organized, even if they are only for my blog, and even if they really will not help me accomplish anything. My list of things to do around the house, however, is suffering as I write this… I simply do not have the motivation this evening to get things done. I feel depressed this evening, and I feel like maybe I just need a big hug and an early bed time… what do you think, Ryan, bed after a late dinner? Sleep helps everything, dontcha know?

One last thought... today I miss some of my friends who I haven't seen/talked to in a while. Stacey, Sarah and Shara, are you out there?

Blissful Pregnancy Peace...

I saw this picture today when I was looking at some others saved to a CD. The day I took that picture was a happy day. I had been to see my mom that morning, and I was on my way home and just had to stop and take a picture... the day I took that picture was a pregnant day. My morning sickness had passed, and I was feeling good! Little did I know... but, as usual, I must move on. I must search for that Blissful Pregnancy Peace again. I don't know if I'll ever find it. How will I feel when I see those two lines on a pregnancy test again? How will I feel when I visit the doctor for my first ultrasound, where they check for a tiny little heartbeat? How will I feel when I near 13 weeks, and then 15 weeks... when we found out about our precious Brody? Blissful Pregnancy Peace (ignorance?) isn't something I'll ever know again. I hate that.

Christmas can kiss my @ss this year!

I know what you're thinking... "my god, two posts in one day? I sure hope someone got Christina a LIFE for Christmas!"

Truth is, I'm only here a second time around because I need to complain. I need to mope and whine and be a little bit bitchy.

Today is getting worse by the minute, or at least that's how it feels. I woke up this morning feeling pretty optimistic. I got all of my errands done before 10:30 and I was home by 11:00! I wrapped presents this afternoon after cleaning out the fridge and putting away the groceries, and somewhere in the middle of all of that my mood did a 180-degree turn and now I feel like crap.

I realized a little while ago that today is December 23rd (I know, "duh!" right?) and November 23rd was the date of the ultrasound that confirmed the loss of our babe. It's been four weeks. December 26th, we had an ultrasound scheduled for the level-two anatomy scan and what-not and we also would have learned on that day that we were expecting a boy. December 27th is one month (by date, not by weeks) since my hospital stay. I could keep going, but I'll spare you my endless list of dates.

I just feel... down. Instead of visiting countless family members and exchanging gifts and over-eating for the next two days (Three days if you count my step-dad's birthday dinner this evening.), I'd love a chance to put on some comfy PJ's and just hide in bed until it's all over. Save my presents for later, folks... I'll open them in my own little peace and quiet at a later date. Too bad it's not that easy. Too bad everyone would FREAK if I didn't attend the dinners and brunch. Too bad no one really cares what I want over the holidays, because the show must go on... everyone else (Ryan is the exception here) has moved on from what happened to us, everyone else expects that we act "normal" and cheery, and social. When I don't act this way, people make faces and ask questions. Questions I don't want to answer.

I shouldn't be putting all of this depressing CRAP out here right before Christmas... but on second thought, if you don't like it, don't read it. Come back after Christmas when you aren't feeling all "festive" and perky. This is one of few places where it's OK if I don't act like I'm "supposed to" and no one can take that away from me.

A change of plans...

Well... I think yesterday was probably one of the hardest things we'll ever have to go through. I feel blindsided.

About a week and a half ago, the baby stopped growing, so we lost him somewhere between then and yesterday.

I saw my doctor at 1:30 for the spotting and what-not, but she didn't seem worried at all, and mentioned she saw a small tear on my cervix that looked like the cause of the spotting... and then she used the Doppler to listen for the heartbeat and got nothing. So, it was over to the miniature ultrasound machine that they can use in the office... and no movement. Next, we went over to the hospital, where they had agreed to squeeze me in for an ultrasound... and waited from 2:30 until 5:30 to hear the news.

My next task is to talk with a doctor Monday morning about either waiting this out, or scheduling a D&C. I'm leaning toward the D&C simply because I don't want to just wait and see what happens... I feel like I'd be more miserable physically and mentally for a longer period of time, and that's the last thing either of us need.

If you're interested...

Found this site online yesterday...

http://www.i-am-pregnant.com/pregnancy/calendar/week/10

It shows an ultrasound done on someone at 10 weeks. I can't believe the difference between my 8 (almost 9) week ultrasound and this one at around 10 weeks! The little Peanut is really starting to look like a baby!

AND... here's a more recent photo...

Baby's first photo-shoot!

Good news! Little peanut is lookin' good! Here's the photo:



If you're wondering what you're looking at... the baby is that little "blob" in the center of the photo. On the far left is baby's head, making his/her little butt on the far right. At the top are two bumps, which are arm and leg buds. One of the white, more solid dots near the center is the heart, which was beating away yesterday at 188 beats per minute.

My appointment today also went well. The doctor put me on some extra Folic Acid because of a family history of spina bifida, and she tried to listen to the heart beat for me again but we couldn't find it. Probably that was because my bladder wasn't full, so the little munchkin was hiding behind my pelvic bones.

She told me everything looked great from the ultrasound, and my blood work from my last appointment also looked great. So, all around good news!

We find out if we're having a boy or a girl on December 26th, so that will be a fun, slightly late Christmas present... and my next appointment is on Halloween.

I feel so much better now!!

Worry...

Today hasn't been a good day. I'm worried today, and just somewhat "off."

I'm worried today after reading someone's blog about a blighted ovum (basically, a baby who never properly developed, turning into a small bundle of cells and things... a very early miscarriage.) and her issues with getting (and staying) pregnant.

I shouldn't have read the blog... it made me nervous. It seems like every site I visit has some mention of miscarriage, and I wish it would all just go away! It's hard to "just skip over it" and not read the bad stuff... it's this strange curiosity.

My ultrasound is quickly approaching and I'm so scared! What if we go in and something is wrong? What if we can't see the tiny little heartbeat on the screen?

I want to be optimistic, and odds are everything will be just fine and dandy, but I can't help but worry. I worry that I've told too many people too early in the game. I worry that something will be wrong. I worry about how I'll feel (and Ryan) if something is wrong. How do you move on from something so horrible? Let's hope I don't have to find out.

Let's face it: I'm crazy... and I worry too much.

Update

Woops! Sorry it's taken me so long to post about the appointment...

Everything went well. The appointment was more like an "orientation" to being pregnant, where we sat in an office-like room and went over family histories, things I should and should not be doing, etc.
We scheduled an ultrasound for October 9th, and my first "real" appointment for October 10th. We won't be able to tell gender from this ultrasound, as it's still too early, but we'll be able to check in and make sure everything is looking good. They'll measure the baby and see if my due-date needs to be changed, and also check to make sure there's only one little bugger in there!

No crackers!

What an amazing morning!
I didn't even have to eat any crackers before I got out of bed this morning! Now trust me, while this may seem like a minor detail, it's truly a big accomplishment. I'm feeling better these last few days and what a relief it is!!
My appointment is just around the corner, (Thursday afternoon) and I can't wait. Not for the appointment, but for the appointment to be finished so I can schedule an ultrasound.

Ohhh... and as LeslieAnn pointed out yesterday, I'm almost 2 months already... meaning one more month and I'll have made it to my second trimester. I can't believe it! I don't know where the time has gone, and I don't know how in the world I failed to notice this myself. Perhaps it's this brain of mine, which seems to have turned to mush.

What to say, what to say...?

If you're reading this, it's probably because I've directed you to the site... keep checking back, because here is where you'll find up-to-date information about this little Peanut of ours. Yep... we call him... her? The Baby... Peanut.
I'll try to post updates about doctor's appointments, ultrasound photos, and photos of my ever-expanding baby belly.

For now, here is where I'm at in the pregnancy:



I made my first official appointment yesterday... it's scheduled for the 27th of September, but it's not an actual appointment with the doctor I'll be seeing. Instead, it's an hour-and-a-half meeting with a nurse from the OB-GYN office at Group Health.
I've got a big packet of paperwork to complete before my appointment, and at the appointment, the nurse will cover our family histories, what to do and what not to do while preggo, how I've been feeling, etc. She'll also order blood work to check my Rh factor (more on that later), my iron levels, etc., etc.
Next, I'll make an appointment with a doctor (or probably a Certified Nurse Midwife, CNM for short) for an exam to determine if I'm as far along (or further) than we think, if the baby looks healthy, and all of that good stuff. THEN, I get to schedule an ultrasound... I'm so excited for that part!!