Wednesday, December 5, 2007

...moving along!

The days are getting better. I cannot and will not say they are perfect, and not a day goes by that I don't think about all that we've been through. Maybe that is because my physical recovery isn't over with... maybe that's because this has had such a big impact on my life (our lives)... and maybe it's a little bit of both. Maybe it's just too much to put in to words.

Every day I feel a little stronger though, and every day I feel a little more "normal," whatever that is.

We did learn from the hospital pathology report that this was most likely a random, natural occurrence. There were no signs of infection or anything to indicate miscarriage. As I've said all along, it was meant to happen. Most likely, a child has been spared a difficult life, and we've been spared a life of heartache.

I'm going to start looking for a job. Something small, something I won't necessarily feel too tied to once I'm pregnant again, should we still feel that staying at home with our kids is what's right for us. The job I look for will be something I can do while maintaining our household... and my status as a stellar wifey. I'm optimistic about my next pregnancy. Maybe it'll be less of a sickie-fest and I'll be able to keep working for some time into the pregnancy. Only time will tell.

Speaking of another pregnancy, some of you might be surprised to read about another pregnancy on our minds so soon after such a difficult time. For us, what's important is that we get our family. Ryan and I are both so eager to be parents, to start a family of our own... to count those little fingers and toes. The only way we'll get our little family started is to get right back out there and try again. We both realize, and will always remember, we're not replacing anything... anyone. We're just moving along!

1 comment:

Shara said...

It doesn't at all surprise me to hear you speaking of getting pregnant again. Obviously you need to give yourself time to heal (not just physically), but this doesn't mean you shouldn't ever try again. It wouldn't seem right if you guys never ended up being parents. You're such a nurturing person. I'm glad to hear that you're considering a job, though. I was kinda hoping you would. Seems like a good idea to get yourself out of the house a little bit even if only part time. I'm glad you're doing better each day. Thanks for keeping us posted!!!

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