Broken cameras and new career dreams...

Does anyone else feel like the holiday season is slowly drifting by, somewhat unnoticed, or is it just me? Yep... probably just me. Ryan asked me the other day if I was excited for Christmas, and my only response was to shrug my shoulders and blurt, "eh... I guess." Don't get me wrong, it'll be nice to give out the gifts we've searched for over the last month, and it'll be nice to share big meals with friends and family, but I just don't feel excited, or ready, for Christmas. I told myself many times that I'd have a cute little baby belly going by Christmas, and I had started shopping for a cute sweater to wear to dinner. Now, I feel like I'll be lucky if I break out my red sweater from a few years ago in an attempt to look somewhat festive and happy.
That's ok though. Not every holiday has to be perfect, and life goes on, even if I don't feel the same this year about Christmas.

On the subject of Christmas, I was finally able to get a couple of photos of our silly, sparkly white tree. Here it is!

First, a close-up view of the big gingerbread cookie star:


...and here is the whole tree:


Speaking of photos... the camera is toast. It would cost well over $100.00 to ship it off for repair, and at that rate, it would be more effective to just buy a new one. But, my mom happened to come across the camera we bought when we were in Europe last summer due to my mush-brain forgetting the charger at my parent's house. So that means we've got a camera to use until we get something new... I'm going to ask everyone to go in together to get me this for my birthday:



I've realized over the last few days that I want to do something with my life. I mean, duh! Who doesn't? But I want something more... I don't want to get up every morning, get ready for a drive to a job that I don't like for various reasons... and then come home, cook dinner and go to bed. Instead, I want to have fun at work! I want to PLAY and be paid for it. The difference in the realization this time around is that I actually feel like I have the power to do something about it.
So, as crazy as it might sound, I'm going to do some research and see what it would take to start something related to photography. I might take a class or two as a jumping off point. I'd love to eventually have a business of my own as a wedding and/or portrait photographer. That would be a job I'd be PROUD to do... and I'd be my own boss.
Tell me I'm crazy and doubt my ability if you want to, but for now this is a dream I'm stuck on... now let's just see if I can make my dream come true. Maybe I'll get a slow start, and that's ok with me too. I still want, more than anything else, to be a SAHM and to be there for my kids. When they're a bit older and they're in school, maybe that is when my dream will really take off. Who knows? But it's fun to think about.