Sunday, May 17, 2009

Mom's Day Pedicure: Blissful Torture

I spent a big chunk of Mother's Day with my mom this year. You know--like a good daughter! We had a great time shopping for beads at Shipwreck, grabbed some lunch, and then we were scheduled for pedicures.

This is where it got dicey.

Approaching the salon, I felt like I was approaching a life-sized bee hive. or an ant hill. Something with a lot of chaos and commotion. Seriously--have you ever tried to get within twenty yards of a salon on Mother's Day? Don't. Consider yourself warned.

I opened the door and was slapped in the face by a wall of acetone. I breathed deep and relaxed a little. Happiness is. Give me a break! It's been a long time since I had a pedicure!

We went in. Lining the left side of the long, narrow shop were ten massage chairs for pedicures. You know the type... they look like they're capable of just about everything, including launching occupants into the next stratosphere. Lining the right, I spotted a series of lamps, brushes and masked nail techs. Swine flu? Nah--they're just trying to keep out some of the fumes, I s'pose.

As instructed, we picked our colors and then followed commands to "sit here" and "there."

Sinking into my massage chair, I punched a series of buttons only to discover that one button worked. It simply said "auto" and it lead to a rotating chorus of pulses, vibrations and kneads. Whatever. I wasn't going to argue.

I plunged my feet into the basin below me. Lukewarm water, probably a result of a few too many pedi's for the day. My feet soaked and I leaned back, waiting for the next available person to begin clipping, filing and primping my ten little piggies.

When she sat down, I knew she was going to give me a run for my money. She looked... rough... no-nonsense, and certainly not gentle.

My toes curled.

Things were fine in the beginning. I focused on my back-massaging chair and conversation with my mom and the lady in the neighboring chair. But then. Oh, then. She dug out those vicious nail clippers... the kind that look more like pliers than clippers??

She shook her head and I heard a quiet 'tsk, tsk' as she dug deeper and deeper into my nail bed. It became quite obvious that I had, apparently, offended her with my lack of attention to details concerning my southern most extremities.

As she snipped, clipped and dipped my feet, I rested my head back in the chair and waited for the end. I knew she couldn't dig forever, and certainly, she had to be close to done, right? I wondered, 'do I even have any nail left??'

My reprieve came--she was done! I sighed as she dipped my smooth feet into little bags of hot paraffin wax... this is the reason for a pedicure. The nice part. Minutes later, I watched as she artfully painted white stripes at the ends of my nails, creating the 'french manicured' look. My favorite.

With that, she was done. I wriggled impatiently as my nails dried. Is there anyone on the planet who likes those little wedges they cram between your toes? *shudder*

Slipping my flip and my flop onto their respective feet, and with a smack of my right calf, as if to say 'get out of my chair!' she uttered four little words... "all done, thank youuuu!"

We were done. I double checked--yep, still ten toes with ten nails.

Something happens when you walk out the door and the acetone permeated air clears itself from your nose. You look down, see your twinkling toes, and resolve to go back. Soon. So your toes always look this fabulous.

Pedicures. Like a narcotic.


Shara said...

Ah the way you paint a story. Fabulous. :) I really should paint my toes...they've gone bare too long.

Eve said...

giggling... my toes curl instinctively and I start sweating when I know I am in the hands of a rough pedicurist! I'm way overdue too! time to go pick my color! :)

cute story, C!

indigoghost said...

My mom and I got mani-pedi's last mother's day... Amazingly, it was the one salon in Lacey/Olympia that wasn't cram-packed... we were the only customers! I'm surprised, because they were awesome... they even did Lily's nails for free! I forgot the name.. but it's over there by Sizzler. :D

Heather said...

Ahhh...a a pushy no nonsense technician. I think the last one I had done was a week before I went into labor (yes, the toes do have to look good in the stirrups don't they?). My daughter is 15 months and I'm thinking a pedicure sounds like heaven! French is my favorite too! They make the toenails look so clean and fresh.

By the way, there is an award for you over at my blog that you are in no way obligated to accept or play along. It just means I enjoy reading your blog. :)

Swampgirl said...

I've never had a pedicure...I just do not think I can let a stranger mess with my feet! You confirmed my fears...sounds like the dentist in away...just the other end!!!

tracy said...

LOL! yeah, thats it all right :)

and I hate those wedgie things too...


TitansFan said...

Yeah, that Pedicure Massage Chair at my wife's spa could probably send ya to the moon with all the different things it does!

Anonymous said...

u kw wht i could gv u a better option... why dont u try giving ur mom a good pedicure.... dont panic, its very simple. i am doin it myself. i do it for my sis n she enjoys it. i sometimes get my extra perks from her :)
i read o=about it from this article.. read it n try it. i am sure ur mom is goin to lov u fro it... let me kw ..


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